First Things First

Whew.

I’m not sure whether I’m nervous or happy. I do know, however, that I’ve got this terribly insistent pressure somewhere in my tummy and my heart is beating faster than normal.

Why not… for the first time, I am actually blogging.

Now, I know that this may sound overly naïve or even stupid to all “natural” bloggers out there, but hey… that’s you and this is me.

This doesn’t come easy to me at all. Not by a long shot.

But I’m doing it anyway.

As to why, well, I won’t lie. Someone who is very special in my life sort of guided me towards this. He’s my employer, Mr. Peterson. Isn’t that rich? LOL Most employers frown on their employees blogging, but Mr. Peterson doesn’t only let me blog (sometimes, even during office hours), he actually eggs me on to do it.

For me to keep a tighter grip on my sanity, he says with a half-smile.

Uhm… I dunno if that should make me relieved that he understands, or worried that he can see right through me.

For some reason, I keep thinking of Henry Miller’s Tropic of Cancer right now. I first read that book when I was around 11 years old and I admit most of it didn’t make much sense to me then. I’ve reread it now and then over the years, though, and parts of it are going round and round in my mind as I write. Crazy.

If you’re familiar with that novel, you understand don’t you? Hah!

If you’re not, do yourself a great favor and start reading. It’s a book that defies classification, being considered an awesome and unique class act by some of the greatest writers of the century (Beckett, Mailer, Orwell). At the same time, it was the catalyst for an obscenity trial that put to the test US laws on pornography.

Hard to figure out, huh? I guess that’s why I like it. I’m attracted to things I can’t understand. I do hope though, that as time goes on, and if you stick with me, you can help me make sense of things someday.

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I am David Garcia and my current frame of mind is: Surreal.